I can hear it. The anxiety mounts. My brain kicks into full-banter mode, "Ugh! I'm pitchy. It's those high notes. Why can't I match them and be on pitch? I need to make time to practice. After years of doing this, you'd think I'd have it down by now."
It goes on and on. My voice strains harder. I completely lose focus and the pitch gets worse.
My instructor says with conviction, "Open." I snap out of the relentless brain chatter and watch her make a facial gesture of surprise, dropping her mouth down, opening it wide. There it is - her voice crystal clear, like that of an angel. Perfectly on pitch and purely expressive in flow.
Suddenly, my focus returns and I plug back into the energy that we are exchanging. I relax. I open.
And there it is...the pitch! I am one with it! I become the air that vibrates from me into all that is around me. I match her voice. We sing the melody with the piano. The "ahhh" moment happens - the sound dances, vibrating in synch with vocal chords and piano strings. And there is music.
She remarks, "Stop worrying about the pitch. At least you let it out now. That's progress from when I first met you."
Yeah, well, I guess I just need to let it out...step beyond the pre-recorded loop of "past woes and insecurities" rattling my brain hemispheres and settle into the simple, quiet present...and get out of my own way.
When I do this, I get out of our way. And thus, we can move the air together and make music.
Hmmm..maybe if we all plugged into the present moment of energy exchange with one another, the vibration of air would move mountains...or at least perceived obstacles.
_______________________
When I shed worry, fear and insecurity, I awaken to the present, the only place where I am free and unlimited in my commune-ication with all that is.
"Two voices raised together call to the hearts of everyone, to let them beat as one. And in that single heartbeat is the unity of love proclaimed and given welcome...for what is Heaven but the union direct and perfect, and without the veil of fear upon it." ~ A Course In Miracles
2 comments:
GREAT POST, Amber! What a difference it makes when I get out of my own way...often easier said than done. Thanks for sharing your journey with us. Together, sharing our various paths, life becomes much more possible and fun! See you at El Saguarito tonight!
No fear: I second that!
So beautifully articulated. Nuthin's gonna stop you now... ! Amen. xx
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